Are you too hard on yourself?

Yes! 

I like to please people and I like to be liked and yet I also do what I like. I’m a people pleaser but not a carpet, so to speak. The inspiration for today’s post stems from a few things, such as my job, my friends and the way that I am. 

Today at work I was given a task, which I didn’t do incorrectly but it wasn’t as it was expected to be done and it upset my supervisor. My mistake, in hindsight, is poor time management. I was given another task by a partner which was just as urgent and I should have communicated that with my direct supervisor. The problem is that I really wanted to complete the task myself. I ended up taking too long to turn it around, because of the second task and then the work product I delivered wasn’t great. I feel just awful about it and there isn’t anything I can do fix that. Ugh, tomorrow should be a better day! #needaholiday 

Now the friend issue, it’s most inconvenient. I have learnt to not trust too easily so I chose not to share something with her. I have since shared the information and she got upset about it because I didn’t tell her sooner, she now has her guard up and won’t speak to me as before. I understand her point of view but I’m not sure how to convince her that it isn’t personal and I don’t share everything with everyone, it’s just the way that I am. 

Quite a dilemma, it seems. I’m curious to see how tomorrow will turn out. 

You maybe curious the connection of the featured photo to this post. Well, I like rainbows and in days where I’m disappointed, I love how the simplest things such as a rainbow shining in darkness, makes me feel like everything is going to be ok. 🙂 

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Sensitive soul

The most difficult thing I’ve come to realise is trying to still be good to those who only do you wrong. When I was younger it would make me curious how my parents were always good to those, even if they were wronged. I grew up with such morals and have been taught that no matter what happens, always be kind. 

How do you maintain a balance? I am a sensitive soul, in hind sight, I always have been. I feel deeply about everything, whether it be happiness, sadness, confusion, anger, and anxiousness (can’t think of any more words to describe emotions). 

You may ask, what is a sensitive soul? Well for one, don’t be fooled by such individuals, they may be sensitive but they are far from weak. They have the ability to put aside their own needs and feelings to cater to those that need a boost. Their ability to feel deeply makes them great empaths thus helps them truly understand what the other person is going through. Often times people are unable to express how they feel and the sensitive soul will verbalise those feeling to the point, which shocks some people, sometimes. The emotions they feel are their strength as they allow themselves to feel deeply, thus making them able to handle a situation and controlling their feelings better than those who brush their emotions to the side. They can handle more than most because they’re used to feeling more than most. 

Being a sensitive soul also gives you a hightened intuition in someways because they notice everything, even the most minor details such as a change of expression on someone’s face, which may have only lasted for a second. At times when logic makes no sense, their souls are able to come up with answers that does make sense. However there is a flip side, often such people have insecurities that cloud their intuition, as I have experienced many times and I think it’s important to listen to your intuition. Even if your mind tells you otherwise, listen to your inner voice, before the voice disappears forever. 

Being around a sensitive soul, you will notice that they give you their undivided attention (to be fair sometimes people drag on a story longer than it should be and I get distracted). They can judge a situation and give you what you need. Even if it is just someone to sit quietly with. There is comfort in silence. 

They have compassion on a deeper level and have the ability to move the world. Their kindness shines through their face and you can feel the genuine love they have to offer. They have so much to give and the ability to give wholeheartedly without being worn down. If anything the giving fuels them, especially when they see the joy on people’s faces. That is priceless. 

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Have you ever?

Have you ever looked at a full grown person and wondered what they looked like when they were babies?

It used to be my favourite thing to do when I didn’t have my ipod or a book to read on the tube (aka the underground train in London). Of course I would look away before any eye contact was made, didn’t want to be break the unwritten rule of “no eye contact”. I love how my imagination takes me to unknown territory. It’s not easy of course to picture a man with a full grown beard as a baby, or an older person who looks so tired and sick of life and it shows on the face.

Have you ever cut your hair? I don’t mean just snippets, trimmed but actually completely chop off your long hair into really short, ear length hair?

It’s absolutely the most liberating activity I have taken a part in and I’ve done it a few times. Usually when I feel that I’m losing control of certain aspects of my life and the frustration gets to me,  I pick up a pair or scissors and just cut it all off. I love it and it’s actually quite addictive. I probably would never shave it all off completely but who knows what the future holds.

Have you ever seen something and not believe your own eyes, something that may be paranormal?

When I was younger, I used to play the piano. I wasn’t very good but I would play random things, reminds me I should probably take it up again. Anyway, on one of those days, I was sitting by the window about to play and I see black smoke come out of a building opposite mine. One of the apartments was on fire and I could see the flames burning and in that moment I see a figure step out on to the balcony of his/her apartment and just lean on the ledge. I stopped and looked a little closer and I saw that the man’s (or well at least it looked like a man) arm was on fire and he was just standing there. I ran to go call my brothers to see what was happening but by the time we came back to the window, the man had gone. I still can’t believe what I saw. He was just standing there as his arm burnt.

Have you ever been electrocuted?

Just once and it felt really weird. My mom asked me to change a light bulb in the living room. I took the new bulb and walked over to the lamp that needed the change, barefoot. As I put my hand on the old bulb, to twist it out, I felt a shock go through my whole arm and my hand got stuck to the bulb. First impulse of any person, is to get away from the hurt, in any way. Since my hand was stuck to the bulb I moved away (all whilst screaming and shaking). It all happened so fast and the next thing I knew, the porcelain lamp had fallen and shattered on the ground. I broke free from the electrocution. Honestly, I didn’t even realise I was screaming until my brother came out and asked me why I was screaming.

Have you ever been determined and stuck by it?

Story of my life, which sometimes tickles me.

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I think I will re-read a book

I always thought/wondered why people would read a book more than one or even watch a movie more than once. Maybe it’s the comfort in knowing what will happen next, which is seldom what we can say about our lives. I feel there are so many books (or movies if you don’t read much) that you can read (or watch) and time is finite, so why re-read?

Well, maybe it’s something that many will say as I know it’s a book that many have read, one of my most favourite books is The Alchemist. I read it a very long time ago and it resonated with me, not to mention there was a character in the book that had my name: Fatima. The reason why I want to read it again is because I feel it’s enlightening. I’m stuck in a bit of a rut and reading something that will inspire me is just what I need. The book is about pursuing your dreams and it’s a delightful read, that fits my personality perfectly. It’s got adventure, dreams, positivity and even the desert. It was meant to be written for me! (Just kidding, I do tend to get carried away and even borderline narcissistic at times).

Featured image represents the promise that I will make to myself to do what I can to be inspired again.

Nowadays I lack inspiration, which is why I haven’t posted something in a while. I’ve caught the lazy bug too and I just don’t feel like doing anything but watching Frasier and sleeping. It’s quite a vicious cycle and I just feel tired all the time. I read an interesting article before I started writing this post, which you can read here but I can’t say I agreed with it. I’m not a negative person and if I want something, I keep trying until I get what I want (Please click here for an example). I am persistent, even though in my persistence I get lazy as I tend to also get bored easily. Sometimes even when you’ve tried your best things don’t go the way you want them to and it’s frustrating so I don’t agree with the article because it’s a little unfair to many of us who do try. Having said that, I agree with certain aspects of it, for instance even if you have faced a challenge which you are still trying to overcome, regardless of how many times you may “fail” I think it’s important to keep trying. Until when? Well I think it’s until you’ve made peace with the fact that maybe it’s just not meant to be or until you’ve found something better and it just magically worked out, easily.

As cliche as it may sound, the only true failure, in my opinion and the opinion of many others, is giving up.

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Happy International Woman’s day

Is this day sexist? No it isn’t I just checked.

Funny, I’ve never really heard about International Men’s day, but it does exist and their day is the 19 of November.

This year’s theme for Woman’s Day is #beboldforchange, please click here if you want to be bold for change. This post will be filled with inspirational quotes, and my perspective of those quotes, which will be applicable for both women and men, alike.

In the words of Marie Curie:

Now is the time to understand more, so we may fear less

In the current climate and due to internet, we have access to a vast amount of information and thankfully we have also been blessed with a mind. So now, more than ever, is the time to understand, once we understand, automatically fear diminishes. It’s amazing how Marie Curie said this maybe 100 years ago and I think this quote will be applicable in all times and ages. For those of you who don’t know and want to increase your knowledge on a deeper level, you can sign up to free university courses here. It’s an excellent platform and that includes a variety of subjects. Let’s be bold and learn more, so that we can better understand the world we live in.

I love Coco Chanel, so this post would not be complete without a quote from her:

The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.

I agree and her words inspire me, every time I feel shy about speaking up. I think life’s too short for every thought to just be a thought, thoughts dream to be real and the only way you can make your thought’s dream come true is to say them out loud. Don’t be shy, don’t be rude and be bold. Speak up, the world deserves to hear you and you deserve to be heard, it’s definitely something I must constantly remind myself.

Speaking of dreams, reminds me of Frida Kahlo’s quote:

Feet, what do I need you for when I have wings to fly?

I really like that, especially since for those of you who don’t know this, Frida was in an awful accident which rendered her paralyzed from the waist down. I love the positivity this quote demonstrates and I believe we all have what it takes, if only we believe in our selves, the way she did.

One must also be confident in their abilities, so I think it’s not enough to just believe in ourselves, Cleopatra put it so eloquently:

I will not be triumphed over

I love that. I love the simplicity of this quote and yet how much power it holds. As many of you may know, Cleopatra was the last Pharaoh of Egypt and people were drawn to her, not because of her beauty which is a myth as she is now known to be a simple looking woman but for her wit and intellect. She had charm and charisma that Caesar and Antony could not resist. Above all, I think it was her confidence that made her as alluring as it did.

I could go on endlessly as there are many inspiring great women, however I do not want this post to drag on. Maya Angelou is one of my favourite writers and I feel it is worth mentioning her too, so lastly but most certainly not the least, Maya Angelou said:

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Maybe I haven’t lived long enough to learn what she learnt, which lead to her saying that but it is the way I live my life. I like to be liked and I like to be there for others and add some value to their lives. I want to be remembered for my kindness and I try to be. Although often times it’s not easy to be kind all the time, specifically when I’m hungry and tired, then it’s a mission impossible. All silliness aside, I must say I do agree with her. I am an empath and I feel what others feel on an intense level, which makes me cautious before I do or say something which could be remotely hurtful to others. People do forget what you have done for them and maybe the thing that they remember is how you made them feel.

Happy International Woman’s day, we’ve come a long way as women and we must strive to be better, always, in every way. #beboldforachange and let the change be for women to empower each other rather than put each other down. 🙂

Featured image: google search images for “we can do it”

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Never lose your childish innocence

As I was grabbing lunch today, I saw a little girl, skating on her scooter and as she went past me she was in her own little world, humming away.

It made me remember a line from the movie Under the Tuscan Sun, which is one of my favourite movies, when Katherine says “No matter what happens, always keep your childish innocence. It’s the most important thing” It is also something the Italian director and writer Fedrico Fellini said. 🙂

I really like the idea behind this, we get so caught up by the unnecessary stresses of life that we lose our childish innocence and it’s sad. I think it’s important to take a step back to reflect, re-ground ourselves and just keep it simple. To quote Leonardo Da Vinci

Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication

I wholeheartedly agree with him. There’s elegance in being simple, which is why everyone I know owns a simple black dress (although their reasons can be entirely unrelated to this idea) and would also explain why Mona Lisa was such a masterpiece. If you analyse the painting, there’s nothing spectacular about it and at the same time everything about it is spectacular. It’s a simple paining of a simple looking woman and it represents so much grace, elegance and sophistication, in the way that she is smiling, sitting and looking at the painter. Arguably, she was drawn from the imagination of Leonardo Da Vinci and wasn’t an actual person, but still. I can somehow understand where he was coming from when he said that, even though maybe the context of why he said it might be completely different.

This also makes me think of Einstein’s quotes:

Things should be made as simple as possible but not any simpler

Things should be simple, I don’t understand the incessant need people have to complicate matters. For example, lawyers are known to be all fancy shmancy when usually they can say what needs to be said in three sentences rather than 3 paragraphs. Although, in our defense, this has changed immensely and good lawyers are known for their succinctness and the following quote emphasizes and proves that:

If you cannot explain it simply, you do not understand it well enough

and lastly, since I am speaking of keeping it simple, Einstein’s quote:

I believe that a simple and unassuming life is good for everybody physically and mentally

This is where I don’t agree with Einstein. I was listening to a song called Happiness sung by Needtobreath, a song I felt they sung for me as it resonates with me on so many levels and in the song they sing:

I’ve got dreams that keep me up in the dead of night telling me I wasn’t made for the simple life…

I don’t think everyone is made for the simple life and I don’t think one should be simple in every aspect of their life, just maybe in the way they communicate. I think a conscious effort must be made to keep things simple, don’t over stress and don’t sweat the small stuff. Sometimes it’s better to take things at face value and not allow yourself to overreact to something that’s nothing, don’t assume anything without having hard facts, as Eintein did say “unassuming life”. This point is crucial as the less you assume the more peaceful your life will be, mentally and if you’re mentally at peace then you’re mentally healthy, I think that makes you somewhat physically healthy too.I mention this because often times I find my girlfriends complaining about a man in their lives, where they’ve gone 100 miles away from the facts because they’ve assumed the worst and built a whole story in their mind. Having said that, a lot of the times they get the worst advice from their girlfriends.

If I can add any value to anyone’s life, please do not assume anything about anyone, until you know for a 100% that they’ve done something wrong and even then, give them the benefit of the doubt and hear their side of the story. 🙂

Featured image: I chose this photo for the featured image because there is nothing more innocent than nature, it’s simply beautiful and I didn’t use filters to enhance the image. At the same time, I like that over the horizon you can see the complexities of life, aka high rise buildings and it’s complex nature, thus demonstrating a balance in the world.

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The City of Bath

I went on a road trip to Bath with my best friend.

It was one of those holidays I want to re-live over and over again. It was just before the christmas market stalls were set up, so the magic of christmas was everywhere. I love the way the air felt when we got out of the car and took our luggage out. We were quite lucky, it was a sunny day and we had the chance to really enjoy the city.

This is where we stayed:

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It was the cutest little hotel and in such a convenient location. It had a really satisfying english breakfast and the best pecan danish I have ever had. I LOVE pecan danishes, it’s probably my favourite pastry. It was perfectly crisp and fresh and the pecans were crunchy, just as they should be. It was delightful.

We were only there for one night and when we woke up the next morning, I nudged my friend awake. We were just getting our teas when I noticed that we could climb out of our windows and sit on the roof. This was our view:dsc_0853

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We sat there for a few minutes just taking in the freezing air. Crazy how things have changed so much since that day, she’s married now, with the cutest kid I’ve ever met, I moved away and I feel our lives have gone in such opposite directions, it breaks my heart at times. I feel I don’t have much in common with her anymore, however I do have a tendency of over exaggerating things in my mind. Well, regardless of how things pan out in the future and where our lives take us next, we will always have Bath, London and Scotland (all the places we’ve been together) and she will always be my best friend. It boggles my mind how it’s been almost three years since we sat on the roof, enjoying the view, not even speaking. It was pure bliss.

Saying that I miss it is an understatement and it’s weird because I haven’t really thought about that trip of mine until today, as I was flicking through my photos and remembered it. Bath is a beautiful city and here are a few photos of the city:

We were only there a day and a half and I think we covered all the main attractions. Things you must see/do:

  1. the Roman Baths (of course), it’s a natural spring and the water is naturally warm, the temperature ranges from 69 -96 degrees celsius. Quite fascinating.
  2. You have to eat a Bath bun, I’m salivating by just mentioning it.
  3. You must also try their fudge, it’s divine.
  4. We did a very touristy thing, which was to have high tea at the Pump room, it was my favourite part. I love tea and scones and everything that represents high tea.
  5. Bath Abbey
  6. The Royal Crescent and the Circus (shame the trees were so bare, otherwise the circus is quite a sight)

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Would I go back? Absolutely. It’s no wonder Jane Austen was such a good author, aside from her talents, she lived in a place that I feel does inspire so much creativity.

The city has so much character, it’s charming around every corner, not to mention it’s drenched in such rich history. The people are equally charming. 🙂

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